Reflection on a Year of Marriage
It wasn't until last week that I remembered Wesley and I had our one year anniversary arriving within the week.
Has it really been a year? It feels like it's been years since we said I do and, yet, at the same time only hours.
(A few wedding shots for fun)
We've really had to do our parts in the for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love, and to cherish part of our vows.
Yesterday, Wesley asked me what I've learned is the most important thing in marriage is so far. I said, to have each other's back and communicate. Although these things are important, I woke up this morning and changed my mind.
To me, the most important thing is to have faith in and lean on the Lord to provide my needs, not Wesley.
When I reflect on this year I see time and time again where we had needs and the Lord provided over and over and over.
Despite the fact that Wesley's job as a ton of overtime, he had almost none for the first six months of our marriage. He'd go to work and he'd come home and be able to care for me when I was at me worst during the pregnancy.
We had just moved and I was so lonely. I had a friend start sending me a video every morning to ask how I was feeling and tell me what she was up too. I would respond to her videos and literally be lying on the bathroom floor with matted hair. She didn't judge, she'd simply laugh and tell me it's okay. One day the pregnancy would be over and everything would be okay.
I was able to quit a my job and focus on making it through my pregnancy and started a small design business for authors.
He provided financially for the extra costs we had this year and provide a community who made sure we were taken care of.
Despite a COVID scare, my mom tested negative, and was able to stay with us to make sure we were fed and rested while trying to deal with healing and the NICU. She sat there for weeks in our apartment constantly reminding us that despite our situation, God was good.
I could go on, but you see my point.
Throughout this year, Wesley has been a rock. He's taken care of me, cherished me, loved me, and had my back no matter what—and I hope he feels the same about me. However, he is not my savior. We still have arguments and rough days where everything seems to go wrong. We have issues the other cannot fix. There are things we can't change about each other.
I have to stop and turn back to the One who is perfect in all and can fill us up.
While this year had all of its twists and turns, I am so thankful for the changes it has made in me. More than anything, marriage has taught me how vastly and creatively God can provide. He is faithful and He is good even when the situation is completely different than what I planned or pictured.
I wouldn't change a single thing.